So keep moving. Watch your elders to notice any differences in their gait and mental aptitude. What you do about it is of interest, but their safety is important…physically and mentally. Which brings to mind something else.
My Mom at some point unknown to me joined a network of supposed elders and exchanged greeting cards with strangers. She sent cards and she received many cards. How sweet. I suppose so. Maybe a bad response on my part. I thought it was BS. I get it. I just don’t see it beyond the absolute lonely out there and maybe that was my mom’s intent. But, she didn’t really know about these strangers she wrote to.
She sure as hell didn’t notice the return address to the Oregon State Penitentiary from some predatory asshole that was writing her. I put a stop to that and clued her in. Of course, I wasn’t delicate enough. She was living under our roof in decline, in hospice, and soon dead.
Today, I heard of another elder, living alone, at odds with her daughter. Somehow, the facts are still sketchy, she made the acquaintance of an asshole. She corresponded with him. He eventually showed up at her door and of course was admitted. Once inside her home, he restrained her. Drugged her. ‘Assaulted’ her. Robbed her. She may or may not make it. Will she ever be the same? Will her family, who had backed away to keep the peace, be the same?
Without delving into either of the above incidents….the dynamic is the same whether we are talking about there taking their meds, living safe, hoarding, asking for help, consorting with assholes: are you involved and if not, and near, is it because you are avoiding the wrath, the anger, the cold shoulder, the guilt? Hmmm…one can see there are various degrees of guilt and regret.
So tell me, do you do a better job of tracking your twelve year old’s conduct…who they associate with, their health? Do you give a crap at their blow back…nope. I know, I know there is the respect issue and parent/child relationship. If they are acting like a child then you have to respond. But, you decide to be as delicate, patronizing, manipulative as you have to be, just make sure they are safe and no predators are writing them or Lord have mercy visiting them. Speak Up!