My short-term memory is not as sharp as it used to be.
Frustrations abound in dealing with a loved one that is in the spastic throes of dementia (or any consuming malady). I have run the gamut here between face to face, irritable combat: taking every insult personal and a stab to my heart; to learning the cycle of this illness and creating insulation to avoid hurtful energy going either direction. In the end, there is no guarantees in all this that any response is smooth. All those old adages about life ain’t fair etc. are true. All that can I can hold onto is standing back and viewing it with her dignity in mind.
A loose mind, loose balance, loose bowel and bladder, total dependence. Not easy to watch. My advice is study up on this now. If you have an inkling re a loved one then study up on all aspects of dementia. Heretofore, I have considered dementia from the cognitive perspective, but there is a decided physical component to all this.
“In Alzheimer’s disease, an early sign of problems with eating is difficulty in being able to use the utensils. This goes with less care being paid to table manners. These problems progress, so that the person needs to have their food cut up for them. As things worsen, the best that they can manage is to eat messily – usually slowly – with a spoon. Sometimes at the same time, but more commonly later, families notice that the person they care for is having problems getting the food to their mouth. A bib is soon needed.”
In the end, this insidious ‘mental illness’ shuts down the body and claims the loved one….a slow process of decline.