My aunt can not much remember day to day many details. But, the years of counting her coins is deeply engrained. Because she has willingly relinquished her financial management, she is like a fish out of water at times. She said she now feels cut off and in the dark. This despite numerous print outs, statements, receipts, check register…update upon update…she forgets and every few days I must reacquaint her with our arrangements, plans and current financial status.
All along, she professes her trust and comfort with our arrangements. But, I am aware I have to constantly keep her involved. There were too many years alone of literally counting all manner of coins, let alone paper money.
While updating her meds containers (a weekly or more endeavor), my wife noticed my aunt’s ankles were severely swollen. My mom suffered from this. It can be from many causes, but my mom slept sitting up and never allowed herself the comfort of a night’s sleep in a bed. Once my mom spent her final months with us and sleeping in a bed, her swollen ankles all but disappeared. Now my aunt has swollen ankles and it appears sits reclining or sitting up. So, yesterday, we spent time clearing more room on the sofa (bedrooms sealed off with stuff for now). The intent was to clear enough room so she could recline with her feet up on the sofa and elevate her feet to possibly relieve the swelling.
Today, a bit of reduction in swelling, but still there. A visit to the clinic is in order even if the probably solution lies in taking a load off her feet. Discussions about her body are sensitive topics for a woman that did not let anyone into her life or home until recently. Going slow, going gentle….all in her best interest and comfort.