Hoarding Woes: Nagging Concerns

Oh, the weight of the unfinished clean up weighs heavy. Deferred property taxes, overdue home equity loan, best time coming up for one to two more sales (nearby Fall festival event at nursery will draw more than usual amount of people into neighborhood). The mess remains. Dramatically reduced. Monumentally reduced. Yet, two more 40 yard drop boxes are most probably required to get down to the point of an efficient sale in mid-October.

Physical limitations add stress in decision making. Our personal decision making is almost like my hoarding mom’s and my hoarding aunt: it has been suggested that we call in help to do the clean up. BUT, the mental hurdle pops up: how will we trust someone else to decide what should go and what is re-sellable and what is a family treasure. Ha! Sounds familiar. And, such decision making brings the whole process to a screeching halt…totally inefficient. Yet, we rebel from the idea of outside help.

Just yesterday, I visited my aunt, who lives with her sister now. She wants to go home to her hoarding house. We had planned for a few day effort at a minimal cleanup. She forgot about it between the planning conversation and four days later when I came to pick her up. Yesterday, she raised the issue again. I asked was there some task I could do to move stuff from point A to point B without getting rid of anything. She balked at this, saying she would have to be there to be certain nothing was discarded. No trust. I handle all her finances now. Yet, she cannot trust me to move her stuff from one mess to another mess. As she said: “That merchandise is my life.”  Merchandise? All about money for her. Remove anything without authorization, then you are stealing in her mind.

Ugh! We need to move slow and load up on meds. We need to regain momentum, albeit slow momentum and make progress. We have squandered almost a month of time to stay ahead and feel progress is being made.

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